PAUL: I am straight onto the back foot this week and welcome the comeback of the political guru Malcolm ''Cotter'' Turnbull, the man who would have been King of the Republic and the Member for Wentworth. Lo and behold he has returned, shelving plans to quit politics. Ecca, I reckon he's the man to fix the salary cap fiasco and save the NRL. Make him the lord and master of the independent commission. He's rich enough, he could buy the NRL.
ERIC: I second the motion. either ''Cotter'' or Gus Gould can save the NRL from itself, so, Galloper, what are you waiting for?
PAUL: The Reverend Galloper needs a strong man to lead the new body and help him with the problems he's facing In fact, he's got as many problems as the Ruddster with poor polls. But Malcolm who was a ''man in a muddle'' when he said he was quitting political life after he lost the Liberal party leadership, has found a new lease of life. His financial expertise is the right criteria for him to be appointed as new league boss of a commission and restructure the game, heavens above we don't Phil ''I know everything'' Gould to be in charge.
Eric: Man, you're on fire; maybe the NRL should ask you to step up to the plate. After you've donated your heartbeat to the Socceroos cause, that is. What's that all about?
PAUL: I have to find my heart, but occasionally I hear it beating. Anyway, our esteemed colleague Shery Demian wrote about how the people of Liverpool can record their heartbeat at Westfield Liverpool in this week's Champion. Fans turn up and get their heartbeat recorded and the pulse of support will be played in a song for the Socceroos when the World Cup starts in South Africa on June 11. And I hear the Aussies play the Kiwis in their final lead-up game before the big event later this month in Melbourne.
Eric: Marvellous idea. The PM should be enlisted for it, but after this week's polls had him losing the next election to the Abbott I doubt if there'd be a pulse there. Word of advice Kevvie: watch your rear, here comes Julia armed with a spear.
PAUL: Are you waffling on about sport or politics this week, Ecca, next I will be getting more of those Greek history lessons about their best ever halfback Socrates.
Eric: You read my mind, sport, you go first with this week's tips, and if you do gamble, do it responsibly, as Ray Rabbits Warren says on Channel 9.
PAUL: My tips for this week are Australia to thrash the hapless Kiwis in the Test at AAMI Park, Melbourne, and Country to win by a field goal with four seconds to go over City in Port Macquarie, both games are on Friday night. In the NRL, there are four games, Saints will defeat Manly at Brookvale Oval on Saturday night, the Knights will slay the Titans at Newcastle on Sunday, the Storm to blow away the Broncos by 200 points at AAMI Park on Sunday and Roosters to crow loudly over the Cowboys at the SFS on Monday night. Anyway, I believe you have come up with a solution to the Storm's problems.
Eric: Before we go there, how about my Wests Tigers, we get two competition points, thank you the Bye. As for the Storm, well, it's obvious them playing for no points is just not fair on all the other teams. Why? Because the Storm players are playing angry footy and look like they're gonna belt every other team as revenge. So, the NRL has to reverse its decision, and let them play for points just to give the other teams a bloody chance. Of course, like everything else in life, there's a catch: At the end of the minor premiership, Gallop flies down to Melbourne, armed with a loudspeaker, arrives at Storm HQ and declares into his loudspeaker: ''Hey, you cheats inside, I tricked ya, you were playing for no points, ha bloody ha.'' What a solution, brilliant, if I say so mayself. What, you don't agree? Bad luck, I'm finishing off the blog this week. See ya all next week.
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